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I love to look for great curriculum ideas. I’m addicted to books. Does that sound like you? I have so many math books for my K-3 kids I hate to admit it. I’ve never used any of them for more than a few weeks. I spent time and carefully researched them all. I read reviews, considered my teaching preferences and my children’s learning styles. I had great confidence when I ordered them. Felt really good about how they would help. Envisioned us using them happily. I’m the dreamer. My husband, the practical one, would say, “Nothing we’ve gotten has ever helped.” When will I ever listen?
My kids are little sponges. They can learn basic math much the same way they learned to speak. But if I never had spoken to them, they wouldn’t have learned to speak. If I never use math myself in front of them, they might not be too interested. That makes it harder to teach. I know you know third grade math.
A third grader needs to add, subtract, multiply a little and understand the relationship to division. They need to read and create graphs, recognize and use money, tell time (I can tell time), learn about simple fractions, skip count, measure things with different units (length, time, volume), place value. There are a few more, but you get the idea.
I don’t worry about my ability to perform these mathematical tasks. I’m guessing you don’t either. So for math, when my kids are young, I just teach them the same way I teach them how to tie their shoes or flip pancakes--when they’re ready. You know when that is. Try something. If they truly aren’t ready, you’ll know. Don’t stress them out. Or yourself. I have a list of things my kids need for each age/grade and I teach it. I can’t let it go, and I can’t wait til they feel like learning it or til they pick it up on their own. Sometimes that happens--yea for them, but I am the responsible party.
In Ruth Beechick’s The 3 R’s, she addresses math modes (concrete, image, abstract) and the importance of teaching in the mode your child is in. It’s fascinating to recognize these modes in my children. She also includes what math skills children should have at each grade level through grade three. It is a very helpful and inexpensive book. I would suggest getting a hold of it.
You can get it at Christian Book Distributors
I Can’t Use a Boxed Curriculum
But my husband doesn’t use that “script”. He uses a list of what has to be taught, and he continually evaluates the individual needs of the pilot. He discusses things and puts them in different situations so they learn to think. His way of teaching shows them what they already know and shows him what they need to know. Everyone wants him for an instructor. Sounds like perfect homeschooling to me.
I’ve tried packaged curricula for several hundred dollars and single subject packages that have scripts. I’ve also tried internet charter schools which employ similar lesson plans. They never worked for us. I think I finally figured out why.
1. As great of a job as they do writing plans, they just don’t know my kids.
2. I feel trapped by the schedule or the fact that I spent all that money.
3. I’m so disorganized (spontaneous) that I can’t stand the rigidity of a book of lesson plans. Especially someone else’s
4. The worksheets or workbooks they include don’t usually reflect how things are done in real life.
5. They usually use school-type textbooks, which are watered down and don’t always have in depth or accurate content.
6. They can cost several hundred dollars.
So what do I do instead?
Well, for high school I have found fabulous books, and I give my son a syllabus type schedule that I create based on what I know about him. He works on his own most of the time. I’m always there to help him figure out his math, but he’s good on his own with the rest.
For my younger group (grades K, 2, 4), I don’t try to separate everything like I’d have to do with packaged curricula for each of them. That would probably kill me.
We have science, history, art, music, cooking, read aloud stories, etc. together. My 10-yr old gets a little more out of our discussions and projects than the 7 & 6-yr olds, but they like learning together. They’re the Three Musketeers.
They have reading, writing and math at the same time as each other too, but at their own levels.
For reading my 10-yr old reads silently from an assigned or personally chosen (challenging but not too hard) book. The 7-yr old reads silently or to the 6-yr old from a book she can handle, but long enough to challenge her.
My 6-yr old and I spend time reading what he can, and I have him decide how he thinks words are spelled. We also talk about what words begin or end with or other sounds we hear in the words.
After reading time, they get out their writing notebooks. Each binder has appropriate paper in it (wide lines for the older two and blank for the 6-yr old). They copy a sentence or paragraph or words from what they read for the day. The 10-yr old writes other sentences for grammar-type practice, but we stick to the basics at this age. Sometimes they write whatever they feel like. I use the free writing to get spelling words for their personal lists. I also happen to have some published spelling lists this year, but if I didn’t I wouldn’t worry about getting any.
I have a couple little educational computer games I let them use occasionally, but not too much. And sometimes I get Magic Schoolbus or other educational videos at the library--again not too much of this. TV gets in the way so much at our house.
For math, we do what’s needed for the level they’re on. We do a lot of things together, emphasizing different things for each. For example, if they’re estimating how many beans are in their pile, I go a step further with the older one and have her also round the number to the nearest 10 or 100. Or I put her beans in rows representing place value and have her tell me the number.
For guidelines on teaching elementary aged children, I highly recommend Ruth Beechick’s The Three R’s published by Mott Media. It is actually three books in one. A Home Start in Reading, A Strong Start in Language, and An Easy Start in Arithmetic. It explains how the natural method of teaching your child basic reading, math and writing. This can be purchased from Christian Book Distributors.
One last comment: I don’t pretend to have seen every boxed curricula out there. This article is based on the ones I have seen with one exception. Sonlight Curriculum seems to have it figured out too. They put literature (not textbooks) in their “box” for you; and I haven’t used their lesson plans, but they seem to be more flexible and relaxed.
Of my four kids, three of them love reading and being read to. One of them won’t listen to a story more than a couple minutes. She loves music more. My husband and I love books and reading. We’ve always read to the kids. But while my 7-yr old was a baby, my husband was practicing the piano several hours a day for a concerto competition. He used to put her by the piano and let her fall asleep while he played. In fact, Edvard Grieg’s Concerto in A Minor put her to sleep for several years. It probably still would. We didn’t read as much to her when she was very young as we should have.
Our 15-yr old is a book devourer. When he was a baby, his whole body would shake with excitement at the sight of a book. My favorite picture is of him and his dad on the couch. There’s a book between them. I think it was a book on aviation laws (no pictures in there). Our son was looking at it like he was just as interested as my husband. I think he wasn’t even a year old yet.
Some books we read with Dad and we won’t read without him. This really gets the kids excited to read when Dad gets home from work. And they hate it when we stop for the night. It’s good to stretch out a book. You can get to know the characters and think about them between readings. We stretched out The Story of the Trapp Family Singers for weeks. That was good; but when we read Ella Enchanted, we ditched Dad and read it all in one day. That was good too. We like to read both ways.
I believe that if you want readers, you should read to them, in from of them, and even without them. Sit by them and read your book while they read theirs. I’ve seen it take place in our house (and not take place).
When my teen was in first grade, I made a poster with a grid on it. At the top it said, “I Can Read It!” Each little book he read earned him a tiny green dot sticker in a square on the grid. That poster filled up quickly.
Incentives are nice to get them over a rough time, like when they’re learning to read. But nothing’s better to me than just good reading. And there’s plenty to be had.
I love that my kids are learning with real things at home. I don’t need to buy toys that simulate life; we just live life. I let them try what they seem ready for.
It’s not just cooking either. None of us can learn to clean house, read, understand algebra, speak Spanish, play games, use a microscope, paint, type or drive a car without trying it ourselves.
By the way, my 8-yr old now always cuts her own celery, apples and other fruit with a butter knife.
Let’s face it. Everyone in my family eats every meal at home, every time they use the potty-it’s mine, every spill, every painting, every science experiment, bug, leaf or rock collection, every high school biology dissection is on my kitchen table or living room floor. Maps, time lines, book lists, and calendars are my living room decor.
I was at my mom’s yesterday talking about breakables and dishes that belonged to great grandparents. She loves that sort of thing, and she said she had a glass pitcher that she had been “scared to death” to use. When she finally let some use it, it got broken.
All I could say was, “I don’t want things in my house that I’m scared to death to use.”
Several months ago, we were looking for a home and the realtor asked what was important to us. I said, “We like to live in our house and let our kids do the same.”
I’m not taking the world map off the wall and rolling it up every time we get finished with it. It has to be there for those spontaneous times when we want to find out where Tazmania is or we hear about a natural disaster in the news. We want to run over to the map on the wall. Do you think we’d take it out of it’s safe place and unroll it? We probably wouldn’t even do that during a lesson after a while. It stays on the wall.
So I don’t scrub my toilet as often as my non-homeschooling neighbor, even though it needs it three times sooner. In fact that’s what I tell people when they ask me how I do it all. (They think I do it all!) I say, “You should see how dirty my toilet is.”
Is my toilet really that dirty? Usually not, and here’s why. I teach my kids to work. Actually, my husband does that more than I do. When my kids were really small and wanted to help, I let them. I showed them how to do what I felt they could handle, then undid it and said, “You try.” They have to put their own hands on it to really learn it. Don’t you?
I can not do all the work, and I shouldn’t either. I’m doing them a disservice when I do that. Everyone needs to learn to take care of their home. When they complain about having to help clean some mess they didn’t make, I tell them I didn’t dirty their underwear but I still wash it. It’s just what families do.
We have four children and our last two are only 15 months apart. So I was literally pregnant for two years. I know some of you have also done that and maybe more than once. The day after I had my last child, I had a moment of panic. I thought, "If I'm not pregnant, what am I?"
Frequently, I have felt that way with homeschool. Like I have to b teaching or thinking of what to teach all the time. We took five weeks off for summer break before starting school this year. It was the first time in years that I felt like it was okay not to be having school. Can you believe that? We had so much fun. In the past, it was as if I was so burnt out that if I stopped, I might never start again.
I used to think I didn't need any time for myself. I thought I couldn't take a break--even though I was about to drown without one. There was almost nothing left of me. I would read homeschool articles and books where moms would say how much fun it was and how much they like being with the kids. I really wasn't sure I believed that could be true.
I'd like to say I got smart about taking care of myself. But really, I just hit the bottom and had to change. I'm still working on it.
My husband and I decided to put the kids in bed earlier and have an hour with each other. (We were all going to bed at the same time before--crazy huh?) The whole world changed when we did that. I am so refreshed. I'm having fun with my family again. I don't feel like their whole goal is to suck the life out of me, and they are much happier.
Also, I decided I could not take care of every single thing all day long. And this is a biggie-I cannot get emotional about everything that happens. Oh, I'm so emotional. They really take me in. They've learned to be emotional too. I've decided to nip that in the bud. I don't want any of them to be the parent of four before learning to control that.
I really regret ever thinking I didn't need to take care of me. We're all better off when everyone is taken care of.
My life is complicated. Most of my kids and I all have food allergies--different ones. We spend all our money buying food and all our time cooking it. I have two long-haired cats, I have fatigue problems, my husband is an airline pilot, my house is too small for six people, the tub needs caulked, the windshield on the car needs replaced, two kids need new shoes. Doctor visits, teeth cleanings, oil changes, allergy tests. You know my complicated life. You live it. Your list is just different.
I have decided that school will not be complicated. It's up to me. Here are some things that complicate school for me:
-most packaged curricula
-very detailed lesson plans or someone else's lesson plans
-spending too much money on school
-too much internet/computer use
-looking at too many school materials
-complicated or costly experiments or activities
-detailed time schedule
-trying to separate life from learning
-high school credits (I haven't given myself permission to eliminate this one)
-worrying
-telling your children what grade they're in (I haven't figured a way out of this one either)
-cooking lunch at lunch time instead of eating leftovers
-appointments and phone calls during the day
-TV
Again, your list is different, but I suspect there are at least a few things you can eliminate from your homeschool that will help uncomplicate it.
I decided to stop looking on the internet at homeschool materials. What a burden lifted. Now I don't have to think about all those fabulous things I could get or the money I'd be spending. I already have most of what I need, or the library does (I know using library books for long term study is complicated.) I don't want to be bogged down with decisions and shipping boxes.
I gave up worrying a bout how much the kids pack into their heads. I decided my efforts should go to helping them love learning, know how to learn, and think more deeply.
I frequently put my tv in a closet. I causes too much tension.
I was never able to hold to a detailed time schedule, so this year we have things we need to do from 9:00 to noon and at 1:00, we do a couple other things until we're done. It works for us.
I let my answering machine pick up every time, and most people know this. If they want to talk to me they, need to leave a message.
I bought a small chest freezer to cook food ahead and freeze-easy for lunch. This is especially helpful, as all our food needs to be from scratch because of allergies.
I feel so much better since I gave up these stressful things. A friend told me the other day that I seem much less stressed lately. I think my kids really benefit from it too. It's so much more natural for us. We feel like we can breathe. And isn't breathing nice?
Articles posted here:
"I Know Third Grade Math"
"I Can't Use a Boxed Curriculum"
"Just Read"
"They Can Cut Celery With a Butter Knife"
"The Toilet Needs Scrubbed Again?"
"Me Who?"
"My Life is Complicated"
